janisf

chevalier26 , 19 hours ago to ActuallyAutistic group

@actuallyautistic #actuallyautistic I am officially done. I don’t know how people actually enjoy summer, ESPECIALLY with no AC. “85°F is such a nice temp,” just say you enjoy suffering 😭

But no, if I as much as utter a peep about how I’m miserable and overstimulated, suddenly I’m whining, complaining, a primadonna, and “oh so sensitive” about the heat that everyone is SUDDENLY suffering from at the same level as me.

Still can’t ever win.

janisf , 19 hours ago

@chevalier26 @actuallyautistic 70 as a /heat-index/ is as warm as /most/ people can comfortably be at night. that makes it easier to handle heat during the day.

I hope you have a chance to cool off, and that you're able to lay out a future that holds that as a priority.

janisf , 19 hours ago

@chevalier26 @actuallyautistic I'm autistic, and I tend to perceive things as cooler than most. From hot flashes to old ladies cranking their heat to 90°, I'm not sure you can take a whole slice, like NT vs. ND, & nail anything down in regard to heat perception. The way I see it, our (Autist's) LED's are brighter, telling in the dark.

In the mean time, I put 70% hand-sanitizer ethyl alcohol in a spray/mist bottle and peg my ankles with it above 84-5°. That fast evaporation does wonders.

janisf , 18 hours ago

@chevalier26 @actuallyautistic You are not making a mountain out of a molehill. Your scale is more fine-tuned. It's your mountain.

Honestly, I think it's going to be just a little more up to us "sensitive" ND's to figure out the nuances of human adaptation climate change. Stay out in front :)

janisf , 18 hours ago

@punishmenthurts @chevalier26 @actuallyautistic Conversely, I was out sticking Dominoes coupons in people's newspaper boxes (mailboxes weren't legal) at 105° (real, not index, eons ago) in my navy long pants, as if anyone was going to be buying enough pizza to pay me for that time.

We gotta stop doin' stupid shit.

janisf , 4 minutes ago

@chevalier26
I've heard that happens, and that it's not just perceptual. /That's/ something worth looking into.
@actuallyautistic

KoosPol , 22 days ago to ActuallyAutistic group Dutch

@actuallyautistic A while back someone posted a list of like 10'ish autistic traits which could be used for an explainer. I could use that list for an awareness training at work. Can the collective memory help me out? #actuallyautistic

janisf , 22 days ago

@KoosPol @actuallyautistic One that I've found is particularly helpful, but may not have been on that list, is: context-heavy communication. It's not necessarily "heavy," and it's not just communication, but it's a sticking point with non-autistic people. It gets to the meat of one characteristic quite effectively, that "no, no, it all matters!" way of thinking, of being, that autistic folks find so hard to get across.

olena , 22 days ago to ActuallyAutistic group

Just was ‘diagnosed’ with anxiety today after talking to a psychiatrist for five minutes (I’m using quotes because it seems a bit too preliminary to me to diagnose whoever with whatever after about 5 minutes of general talk).
Came asking for #ADHD and #autism evaluation. Was totally ignored on that regard) Of course, didn’t have courage to ask again.

Was it so obvious? Was I just a walking stereotype: middle-aged woman from a war-thorn country living alone who voluntarily came to a psychiatrist(doesn’t matter what else she has, she can’t NOT be anxious)?
Or is it just a general experience of most of #AuDHD female-passing folks: to be seen as anxious, to have most of their symptoms attributed to #anxiety (not like I was asked about any symptoms, but maybe have demonstrated some?)?

@actuallyautistic

janisf , 22 days ago

@heartofcoyote @olena @actuallyautistic It probably is anxiety, maybe plus the ADHD, or what you deal with in trying to navigate a neurotypical world that won't recognize you.

If you have medical coverage, & haven't already, call your insurer for a list of ADHD therapists. schedule one (use the phone, say why you only need one appointment atm) they can either run the test/s, or refer you. That's how I got my autism diagnosis (which I'm not 100% sure is accurate, but...).

janisf , 22 days ago

@olena @heartofcoyote @actuallyautistic

That's just really cool that you have a coworker who can do that with you! I struggle with phone calls, too, but I can't imagine adding language on top of that--wow.

Uair , 1 month ago to ActuallyAutistic group

@actuallyautistic #cia #nsa

I finally figured it out!

https://open.substack.com/pub/poloniousmonk/p/finally-my-life-makes-some-kind-of?r=1xr9v7&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

janisf , 1 month ago

@Uair @actuallyautistic Dude, that was a hard read. And even if it's all true, writing like that is so self-absorbed you're not going to connect with anyone. If you can't reach out to people where they're at, you're going to keep banging your head against a wall. Maybe for now you forget the NSA and just build a life with genuine connections using the thought-language those people need.

PixysJourney , 1 month ago to ActuallyAutistic group

Question to fellow #NeuroSpicy #AuDHD folks... :confusedparrot:

For what sort of toots could I use hashtags like #ActuallyAutistic or the previous two I just used?

I Toot quite a bit about me and my quirky way life. But I never really know if I "should" add any ND hashtags as the "silly" things I Toot about are quite normal to me. If that makes sense 🤔...

I'm proud enough, these days, of who I am. But I wonder if and when it would be good to add some of these tags... Maybe it could help connect with other peeps like me 😇.

Fankoos 🫶🏻 for your help! 🌸

@actuallyautistic

:boosts_ok_gay:

janisf , 1 month ago

@Zumbador @pathfinder @PixysJourney @actuallyautistic Love this. Just because two colors are good doesn't mean they won't clash. And backward, too. If they clash, it doesn't mean they don't have other colors to harmoniously be next to.

btaroli , 1 month ago to ActuallyAutistic group

Today. Was. Just. Too. Much.

Endless work meetings. Slack. Interruptions. HOA Committee Texts. School meetings. School district meetings. Music lesson.

At some point at about 3pm I just had enough. And when this happens I tend to leave chats. Cancel or ignore messages or meetings.

I have to for my sanity. I have learned that if I push on I truly burn out and am not useful for anyone.

Why does our society encourage this???

#ActuallyAutistic #ADHD #AuDHD @actuallyautistic

janisf , 1 month ago

@btaroli @actuallyautistic I'm not sure our society encourages that, specifically, so much as it's been propagated that hard work is how you move up the hierarchy (earn money, be competitive), while not tuning into the gratis labor that parents have to do.

Back in the day, the economic model of traditional family labelled parenting a FT job, and good jobs paid for a whole family, or so the story went. It's now an antiquated model, but you can still see it on your tax forms.

janisf , 1 month ago

@btaroli @actuallyautistic Set your boundaries ahead of time if at all possible. There are also some really great tips and stories on r/SingleParents.

It's hard. Take care of your health, though, because this moment of life will pass more quickly than you can imagine, and one notable thing you'll have to show for it is the state of your body.

Ilovechai , 1 month ago to ActuallyAutistic group

I don't have the spoons to explain why I feel my neurodivergence is making this worse, but I need feedback or insight from other ND people on a unique experience. This will be a long thread (added in replies) but I'm hopeful there will be a few kind readers who either relate or have something supportive to share.
Here goes:
1/
@actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd
#recoveringfromreligion
#LateDiagnosedAutism
#actuallyautistic #neurodivergent

janisf , 1 month ago

@Ilovechai @actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd z

There are a couple of autism-supportive groups who get table/tent spaces at our local pride. Although there are some church booths there, too, it's not exactly what you'd call a sacred space. The whole religion thing is rendered irrelevant. Super friendly, and the people are there to do nothing but connect people to other people, and organizations.

If you want to get really friendly, and have the chutzpa to be pro-active, volunteer at one.

Uair , 1 month ago to ActuallyAutistic group

@actuallyautistic

How are you with animals?

I tend to throw off the wrong vibe for people, but get along with even the iffy animals. Dogs that don't like most people warm to me.

Just wondering how much of that is autism and how much me. My dad hates animals.

janisf , 1 month ago

@Uair @pathfinder @actuallyautistic With a relatively tiny brain. We can work together, though, and all get smarter. We just have to be nicer to each other, and to other folks, to get that going.

https://news.mit.edu/2024/csail-ceti-explores-sperm-whale-alphabet-0507

janisf , 1 month ago

@Uair @actuallyautistic I haven't had a member of another species really dislike me except twice, a neighbors small mutt who was terrifying, and an orange tabby at a camp I really wanted to be friends with who taught me, in no uncertain terms, how cats operate.

The ants in my house and I are enemies. Trespassing is a captal offense. I will also kill-on-sight centepedes (d* video games corrupting my mind....)