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Ilovechai

@[email protected]

Sipping my chai, keeping cozy and just here to check out what the Fediverse has to offer.

Posts auto-deleted after 2 weeks, except for highly rebooted shares.
I boost a lot.
#socialworker #CultSurvivor #therapist #exmo late self realized #audhd #parentofteens #deconstructioncommunity #humanist #CarlSagan fan, #psychology #cognitivescience #somatic #ifstherapy #yoga #mountains #nature #hsp #singing #mindfulness #humanrights #freepalestine #feminism

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Ilovechai , to ActuallyAutistic group
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Winding Down
@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy
https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=F-AtRZuuykg&si=YFRF2clnPsew0dl5

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

Often, I relate to ND vids but this one has me doubting. I do have autopilot for bedtime routine or shower routine etc, only if it gets interrupted I might forget a step 🤔 So is this universal? So many in the comments relate to the wife on this one, I know it's a spectrum, but can this be used to rule stuff out? Yeah, I'm still out here swinging back and forth pendulum style 🫠
@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C8iqN7Gujft/?igsh=eXQwamMzeGNxYTky

Elvenby ,
@Elvenby@tech.lgbt avatar

@Ilovechai @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy I think first there is a big difference between ADHD and autism, or AUDHD. I'm autistic and I crave having a clear schedule, so every night I do the same things, preparing my coffee for the morning etc., while for an ADHD person I would say it is harder to get habits. The wife in the video seems to be AUDHD (I just checked the # so maybe I'm wrong) so this is a more complicated matter. But anyway I think it is normal to not relate to the video while beeing ND!

Ilovechai OP ,
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

@Elvenby @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

🙏🏻 thank you. I've never been able to tease apart if what could be seen as inattentive tendencies that some suspect is inattentive adhd or if it's just my generalized anxiety that can make me float or dissociate so I've thought I'm likely audhd too so this is partly why I had si much doubt. But it's helpful to hear it's not an exclusive asd experience. Ty.

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
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Literally said this thing to my partner today when explaining how I never enjoyed the non-conseual sexual banter out of the blue from 'dude friends'..I still wonder, are autistics also more likely to be ? As this feels definitely connected for me. I was welcomed and included socially, but it did often feel like others were having more fun than me. This vid satisfied my wondering why.

@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C8e0l44MfJp/?igsh=djIzYWlzMDVxNHk1

EVDHmn ,
@EVDHmn@ecoevo.social avatar

@Ilovechai @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

This is the way! 🥰

Ilovechai OP ,
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@EVDHmn @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

😁🔥👏🏻✅️🥳✨️🙏🏻♥️

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
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@autisticadvocacy @actuallyautistic

"Maybe you have pathological demand acceptance!" 😆

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6hVSL8uIZA/?igsh=MTB6d3dwbmVoa21mdA==

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
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@autisticadvocacy @actuallyautistic

"In our first episode of the Autism and Intimacy podcast, Candice shares the diagnostic criteria for autism spectrum including what symptoms are often expressed but not in the DSM V. She and her husband Chris also talk about a recent communication issue they had and how they have learned to effectively tackle her issues with both sensory overload and communication mishaps. Enjoy!"

https://pca.st/episode/df74741d-9f47-4c2a-ae4a-e99363b54138

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
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@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

I know this is a little a tiny stupid thing but I'm becoming increasingly agitated because my Instagram says that I have a chat message and I have scrolled and everything has been read and that notification will not go away LOL
🥲🤭🤪
@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy @actuallyadhd

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

When the lyrics give you an appreciation for a genre outside your usual vibe.
@autisticadvocacy
Competing and comparison is a no for me though
My growth is not replicable or copy-friendly
I'm powerful beyond measure
The version of me others created in their mind
Is not my responsibility
I normalize saying no when others want too much from me
I uproot any soul ties of attachment that has held me hostage

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=hapxCXuCDeY&si=BWQNaJVFgP1zWdKu

Ilovechai OP ,
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

@autisticadvocacy

Temporary post 👅felt cute will def delete later

video/mp4

18+ Ilovechai OP ,
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@autisticadvocacy

Temporary post 👅felt cute will def delete later

video/mp4

Ilovechai , to ActuallyAutistic group
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I don't have the spoons to explain why I feel my neurodivergence is making this worse, but I need feedback or insight from other ND people on a unique experience. This will be a long thread (added in replies) but I'm hopeful there will be a few kind readers who either relate or have something supportive to share.
Here goes:
1/
@actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd


JoBlakely ,
@JoBlakely@mastodon.social avatar

@Ilovechai @actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd

This thread today sums it up best.
https://spore.social/@bethsawin/112603675081502291

Ilovechai OP ,
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

@JoBlakely @actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd Gorgeous! I'm coming to similar spaces but from the opposite end of things. I overextended myself, masked in a very extroverted way & have learned how to check inward before extending myself; instead of the codependent, people pleasing, happy face coping I did for so long. It's still uncomfortable, but in a new way. Before, I got a lot of attention but was never known. Now it's a little lonelier, special few know me well & I'm at home in my own skin.

Ilovechai , to ActuallyAutistic group
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@autisticadvocacy @actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd

"Sometimes an autistic person may behave in a way that you wouldn't immediately link to sensory differences. A person who finds it difficult to process everyday sensory information can experience sensory overload, or information overload. Too much information can cause stress, anxiety, and possibly physical pain. This can result in withdrawal, distressed behaviour or meltdowns."
https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/sensory-differences/sensory-differences/all-audiences#:~:text=Sometimes%20an%20autistic%20person%20may,anxiety%2C%20and%20possibly%20physical%20pain

18+ matthewtoad43 ,
@matthewtoad43@climatejustice.social avatar

@Ilovechai @autisticadvocacy @actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd NAS are not always helpful as they are primarily a parents and carers of autistics organisation. But this seems reasonably thorough. I'd like some views or resources from people who have more substantial sensory issues than me though.

The point about clumsiness often being a result of sensory issues is interesting, I just assumed comorbidity with dyspraxia.

Certainly office noise can be an issue. The usual answer is of course to wear headphones and listen to music, but of course I accuse myself of reducing my productivity by doing that, and it still leads to awkward social situations. Calibrating the amount of interaction in offices is a pain.

Restricted diets aren't necessarily all that bad, unless you also have to restrict them for other reasons, e.g. worrying about your health, having to get food on the run, veganism, allergies, reflux (also a common comorbidity), other medical conditions... In other words, while it's not necessarily the most important thing, it can still be a major pain in practice. It can also be a significant problem socially, whether dating or group socials.

My relationship with touch has changed over the years. I do have issues with wool, but the main thing is hugs. For many years I would reject hugs. Sometime in my 30s I figured out that I actually enjoy hugs. Then Covid happened. 😐

Ilovechai , to autisticadvocacy group
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Singing helps regulate my nervous system.



@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

18+ Ilovechai OP ,
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

@woozle @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

I'd be happy to learn how to create this, I just don't know how yet.

18+ woozle ,
@woozle@toot.cat avatar

@Ilovechai @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

I got as far as writing a posting-bot in PHP, but I haven't yet tried to write code for reading incoming posts.

Once that hurdle is crossed, the rest would just be subscription management, I think? I can think of a couple of different ways to do that.

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