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ashleyspencer

@[email protected]

My name is Ashley Lauren Spencer. I'm an AuDHD & neurodivergent entrepreneur, writer, and owner of The Autistic Innovator and the https://autistics.life mastodon instance.

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olena , to ActuallyAutistic group
@olena@mementomori.social avatar

Just was ‘diagnosed’ with anxiety today after talking to a psychiatrist for five minutes (I’m using quotes because it seems a bit too preliminary to me to diagnose whoever with whatever after about 5 minutes of general talk).
Came asking for and evaluation. Was totally ignored on that regard) Of course, didn’t have courage to ask again.

Was it so obvious? Was I just a walking stereotype: middle-aged woman from a war-thorn country living alone who voluntarily came to a psychiatrist(doesn’t matter what else she has, she can’t NOT be anxious)?
Or is it just a general experience of most of female-passing folks: to be seen as anxious, to have most of their symptoms attributed to (not like I was asked about any symptoms, but maybe have demonstrated some?)?

@actuallyautistic

ashleyspencer ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

@olena @actuallyautistic Very unprofessional psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are supposed to do a full assessment over a 40 minute visit before they make a diagnosis on the first visit with them.

Richard_Littler , to ActuallyAutistic group
@Richard_Littler@mastodon.social avatar

It's summertime and, as is the tradition, all my neighbours' kids are outside screaming/shrieking relentlessly in a pitch that only dogs (and, as it turns out, autistics) can hear.
'Tis the season of the almighty noise-cancelling headphone.


@actuallyautistic

ashleyspencer ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

@Richard_Littler @actuallyautistic I share your pain. Same thing with the kids in my building. They go in the courtyard and yell and scream while playing.

ashleyspencer , to ActuallyAutistic group
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

Autistic burnout + untreated ADHD =

impulse control issues + inability to force yourself to do anything + drained by no ability to function

Lots of walking pass a mess unable to make yourself clean it, then blame yourself for it.

Distracted, can't focus enough to do fun things and/or take care of yourself.

Forgetting everything. So burned out you can't remember important things + made worse by ADHD.

1/3

@actuallyautistic

ashleyspencer OP ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

Constant feelings of self-shame because we can't seem to make ourselves clean, remember things, focus, etc. like it's somehow our fault, even though we can't control it, and we are so burned out we just don't have the energy for anything

Falling into bad habits that give us a little rush of dopamine because for a moment it makes us feel better

For a moment, we might feel a little better from the dopamine rush, and get hope that maybe we will get out of autistic burnout

2/3

@actuallyautistic

ashleyspencer OP ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

Not knowing how long burnout lasts + wondering how long will it be before we can get an ADHD assessment, so the psychiatrist can prescribe us ADHD meds.

Left to wait and struggle while waiting.

Untreated ADHD can make getting out of autistic burnout seem like it's something in the far out distant future, and left wondering, "When will I feel better?"

3/3

@actuallyautistic

ashleyspencer OP ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

@pathfinder @actuallyautistic well said :RedHearts:

ashleyspencer OP ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

@MaJ1 @actuallyautistic It could be helpful.

At 33, my psych was asking me all these questions for 40 min and didn’t tell me he was doing an ADHD assessment. He said he thinks I have ADHD and wanted to give me meds. I refused to take them because of my experience with adderall at 17 when I was diagnosed.

Took until 34 to admit I needed help with meds, but the Strattera dosages keep wearing off. My psych has to do an ADHD assessment in June to give me stimulants.

ashleyspencer OP ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

@MaJ1 @actuallyautistic it’s worth it to accept help. Why struggle when you don’t have to, you know? I was in denial about my ADHD diagnosis for years, despite 2 diagnosis. So sometimes whatever holds us back from getting help gets in the way, but it could be worth it for you to help improve what you go through. :RedHearts:

ashleyspencer , to ActuallyAutistic group
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

I think it’s safe to assess the results of my poll.

Totaled across 3 social media sites:

583 people voted

I’m autistic / I’m ADHD - 165 votes

I’m autistic / Have ADHD - 360 votes

Have autism / Have ADHD - 53 votes

Have autism / I’m ADHD - 5 votes

There’s no right or wrong answer with how you choose to identify yourself.

@actuallyautistic @audhd

ashleyspencer OP ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

Some said they identify as AuDHDer, and others said ADHDer.

Some choose neurodivergent or neurodiverse.

Whether you use options in the poll or something else, we get to decide what’s right for us individually, and no one has the right to tell us what label we should use. It’s a personal choice.

Thank you for participating.

❤️

@actuallyautistic @audhd

ashleyspencer , to ActuallyAutistic group
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

For AuDHD:

Which terms do you prefer to use?

Do you use ‘have’ or ‘I am’ to describe your autism and ADHD?

Personally, I’m the first one and use ‘I am’ to describe both.

Just curious to see how common each one is. 🙂

@actuallyautistic
@audhd

ashleyspencer , to ActuallyAutistic group
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

Any autistic artists who are also book lovers want to create some t-shirt designs for me?

Book loving and writing themes.

It’s for Autistic Bookshop.

30% from the authors book sales alone is nowhere near enough to break even (need 500 books sold a month), so added merch.

Example below.


@actuallyautistic

All I need is my cat and a good book t-shirt in a pink color
I am always writing a story in my head t-shirt in a navy color

ashleyspencer OP ,
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

@H2O @actuallyautistic that’s a good one!

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