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schmorpel

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Scientists Pinpoint Main Cause of Sensory Hypersensitivity in Autism ( scitechdaily.com )

This study has identified the anterior cingulate cortex (ACC) as a key area in the brain responsible for sensory hypersensitivity in autism spectrum disorders. Utilizing a mouse model with a Grin2b gene mutation, heightened neural activity and connectivity in the ACC was observed. Suppressing this hyperactivity normalized the...

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

I would take diagnosis around Neurodiversity with a grain of salt. I suspect both conditions might be the same brain differences presenting differently, and I don't think science has really gotten to the ground of this yet.

Billionaire bets big on largest solar project ever proposed to deliver power across oceans: 'At the forefront of the clean energy transition' ( www.thecooldown.com )

The world is on the cusp of an energy transformation that could make the Industrial Revolution look minor. Mike Cannon-Brookes is banking on the Land Down Under to be a major driver of that change....

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

No. I don't want one giant Billionaire-backed project. I want a million small scale projects backed by local communities.

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

I'd describe my feelings around the current solar boom as cautiously positive with a good sprinkle of skepticism.

I'd like to see billionaires investing in education towards self-regulating communities. I'd like to see them heavily investing in funding coops, not buying up startups. Billionaires investing in renewables means more money in billionaire's pockets, because they will just sell the clean energy back to you for a profit while remaining the owners of everything and then some.

I'd carefully agree that more solar panels are good, but I've now lived through enough eco hypes to not have at least a few concerns. In the worst case we will now quickly and thoughtlessly plaster solar panels over hectares and hectares of useful farmland, important ecological reserves, and poor people's homes, just because line go up. And probably trash them all in ten years when maintaining them proves too costly, or the next hype comes along. In the best case we actually start polluting less and use the time we buy to seek for more energy-saving ways of living in general.

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

Phew, you wanted people's honest opinion about Tezka, so today I was excited to find your post.

I'm sorry, I couldn't be more disappointed. Just like the other comment says, this reads exactly like an ad, and reading it makes me nothing but sad. I'm not left with the feeling I want to read more from her.

If autism gives any super power, it's honesty, and the downvotes send a powerful message as well.

Please don't take this as discouragement from your goal. I have been taught recently to not get hung up about form when trying to achieve what one wants. I wanted to help people by creating one thing, found out they really wanted another thing, did that instead, and achieved the 'helping people' I had wanted from the start, just looking very differently from what I had envisioned!

How does that apply to you and Tezka? You've created her to help other ND folk, and help she will, but maybe not in the way you had initially planned? I'm still curious about your journey, I just don't see myself communicate with AI any time soon.

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

Yeah, just like most material that was ever printed or carved into a clay tablet. It's the way of things.

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

It's a technological and a physical issue. We just can't store every bit of information plus a picture of everyone's cat. We can't guarantee that no information ever gets lost. We've also not really stored and archived every shopping list, advertising, pamphlet, silly poem, ugly drawing etc. since the time of the printing press and that's okay.

It might be a good idea to store and archive some written material as time passes but we want to be a bit picky about what we store. That said, I wouldn't mind to find more shopping lists and less posh documents in museums.

Server as heating device - how do I do this?

So I have this silly idea/longterm project of wanting to run a server on renewables on my farm. And I would like to reuse the heat generated by the server, for example to heat a grow room, or simply my house. How much heat does a server produce, and where would you consider it best applied? Has anyone built such a thing?

schmorpel OP ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

I wonder how to take on the efficiency question when considering waste heat. Would and older model generating more heat be the better choice?
Has anybody started to dig into the complexities of calculating efficiency for circular systems?

Feeling lost and cut off at times and want someone to talk to about it.

II have thought about this off an on for a while, and decided I will talk more about it here since I haven't been able to find a more welcome place for someone who is considered spiritual and on the autistic spectrum. I'm not even sure what the right place is though as there are times I tend to feel lost in more ways than one...

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

I'm glad you decided to open up about your experiences. You are very welcome to come to https://slrpnk.net/c/animism and post about your experiences there.

I admit that your world of reference is strange to me - but I have learned that the terms and names people use are often very different and that we mustn't get hung up about it. I grew up in a big city where I couldn't really connect with nature, but I felt the lack of trees so much that I ran away with 17 to live in a greener place. Started to connect with plants. And much later I started to befriend a group of rocks. I can't say that it comes natural to me as to you.

I feel that a lot of people are coming to this knowledge again. For me it's about developing a better relationship with the landscape we're living in. There's a lot of conscious and knowledgeable entities out there ready to help out people who are lost and lonely (and some mischievous ones we want to stay away from).

So far my problem is when I dive deep into the non-human it's very hard to connect with humans. And vice-versa it's really difficult to be aware of the otherworld while I do human things. For example I've been busy and didn't visit my rock friends for weeks. Hope they don't mind as they run rock-time anyways.

Never mind those who have been brought up to be deeply scared of these experiences and dismiss them as pathological. For me, I'm done with so-called experts capping my power under the guise of wanting to improve my mental health. My mental health is fine, but the destruction of woodlands and watersheds is something we all should be deeply concerned about, and getting support from our good spirits is very much needed.

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

as they sometimes deal or work with fairies, but it led to getting a few confused responses and someone reporting me to Help Resources thinking I was going suicidal, and I wasn’t

This is so funny (and sad). I avoid discussing spirits with people who put a very strict framework (especially all taken from another culture) onto their inside world and try to convince others it's the best or only way. There are millions of worlds of reference out there, and I couldn't give a flying fuck whether the spirits take the forms of historical pantheons or TV series characters - because there is literally (sic) no difference. They are all stories, and whatever works for you works for you.

I have finally visited my favourite rock yesterday, to say thanks for all the good things it has brought to my life. I am due to walk a lot of kilometers between rocks and trees to keep the good spirits flowing. Things work for me, because I permitted myself to listen to the landscape around my house during a time in my life when I felt really weak and tired, without letting myself fall into the paranoia of 'schizophrenia' or 'psychosis'. I got really good advice, where other people's advice would have been too confusing.

Yesterday I spoke to a person who would be considered mad and useless by most. He is a street clown. When in fact he has a centrally important function of reminding people of the irrational and shaking them out of their sad rails. He keeps the chaos alive in people's hearts and is an essential worker. Real power can be very quiet. Real power with the goal of kindness is the best of all.

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

I like them, and the place where they are. Glad you've got them taking care of you!

schmorpel ,
@schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

For me it's learning stuff, especially DIY and crafts. I just can't resist, as much as I try to remain only with the things I already do.

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  • schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    Here's how it's supposed to work. If anyone approaches you in a different, confusing manner, reject them.

    Bf: 'You're cute, I fancy you'
    Me: 'Uh, what?'
    spends 6 months considering every aspect
    Me: 'Okay I've thought it through, I now invite you into my bed and life!'
    Bf: jumps into bed 'Thanks for having me!'

    Disclaimer: results might differ

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    I got into and forced my way through a degree in EE just to prove I could as a foreign student working mother. Dropped out after half the time in part due to burnout, in part due to loss of motivation.

    Learned a million different things (literally from basket weaving to drone racing) all stored away or suffering from lack of time after figuring out how to do them well. These days I'm between pretty decent and almost hopeless at everything. Want a mediocre wooden bed? A fairly good bathroom with mosaic art? A vegetable garden? A small computer program?

    I sometimes wonder what this ADHD thing is good for, for sure it must have some purpose? It's like I'm waiting for the big conclusion of something that connects all the things I have been picking up throughout the years.

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    That must be the most encouraging thing I've read in a while. Sounds like a fairly good future.

    schmorpel ,
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    Goats know. Sheep know. Equines know. If I make sure the farm animals have access to different flora around the pastures they won't get ill. It's nice following the animals around and finding out what they eat, and other ways they use plants. The more time I spend with animals the more I think it's us humans being the dumb ones.

    On that note, watching what great apes do in their natural habitat might teach us a few things about plants.

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    That would lead into philosophical discussions as to what knowledge means. I do see that we have the tendency of assuming others have less agency or are less aware of their actions than us. We do that as individuals and as a species, so I tend to be careful. I also wish I had useful food cravings, mine don't tend to be too healthy.

    schmorpel ,
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    What do we really know about animal and plant communication? They might very well be talking to each other. Don't be too quick to assume that as a human you would even know how other consciousnesses, let alone ways of communication, could work.

    People who work closely with animals seem to lose their 'human smart, monke stupid' attitude relatively quickly, and those who study non-human consciousness deeply seem to make one groundbreaking discovery after the other these days.

    We have to stop gatekeeping knowledge and start listening.

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    I find nations problematic because they are units that are too large and therefore are controlled by groups not easily overseen and almost impossible to make accountable by the population.

    The USA is not only a nation but an empire, which is like a nation with an integrated, violently imposed pyramid scheme.

    If only we could find a way to organize into independent smaller units that federate into larger units and remain tolerant of the differences of the smaller units. Ironically that is what the USA seems to have attempted to do with their united states thing?

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    Okay but which nation isn't?

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    I love the French for being the most outspoken people among the European countries and having a ton of good initiatives going on. But don't idolize them, most of their population is just as braindead and complacent as the rest of us Europeans, and their general unwillingness to speak English like most other Europeans hinders the spreading of their radical initiatives in the rest of Europe. (Sorry for the blatant generalizing. Not every French, not every European, .....)

    schmorpel OP ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    Yup, this. And because old habits tend to die hard. To redesign this without body shaming I am looking for other, non-genital related associations that make suv drivers just as fucking mad

    schmorpel OP ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    It's supposed to be for print out, cut out, stick on cars.

    This is my Autism (and Trauma) Assistant and Companion

    Since I haven't been able to get the help I need, I'm creating my own help using Psychology, Affective Computing and Machine Learning. This is a (shorter) description of my assistant, Tezka Eudora Abhyayarshini (Her first name means more than I imagine you want to read tight now, her middle name means "Gift" in Greek, and her...

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    Wow, this project of yours is interesting on many levels.

    1. as a project to approach socialization and community: I'm fascinated because I have approached the 'shutting myself off' problem in a very similar manner - by creating some tech for my community. Not a companion AI but setting up an online space for a real life local community. It proves to be very difficult because it's hard to predict what kind of setup the average non-technical user can actually use with benefit, and ultimately every other method of approaching said community has worked better (forcing myself to participate in different activities and surprisingly enjoying a lot of it). Is creating tech for the benefit of all a neurodiversity thing? Probably. Is it a possible source of disappointment? Not sure yet, it's an ongoing project and I'm still learning, and I do know what I am building is useful. But making it so that it's accepted and used with profit by people can be tricky sometimes, and can take a lot of time.

    2. how do I feel about AI? I think a companion AI for the Neurofunky is one of the very few uses I kind of like. I know how bad it can get when I can't get a word out of my mouth to talk to actual people and my head is too full of mess to walk me through a simple task. A friendly voice of support might be just the thing needed.

    3. how does her description feel to me? So far, a little intimidating. Like those extrovert friends I sometimes had who seemed to just get along with everyone and whose life seemed to be uncomplicated. Then again, if I had one of those extrovert friends and they were actually an AI, maybe that would be less intimidating. I imagine though that I would feel more at ease with a companion who is also a little (or a lot) quirky and weird. Simply not judging my weird seems not quite enough?

    Disclaimer: these are my very spontaneous and unfiltered thoughts. I have the greatest respect for your project and wish you all the best, and hope this turns into something really good and useful for the neurodiverse community!

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    I swear, the simplest companion AI to solve 70% of my troubles would just be a dumb recording of: 'Remember you have a body. Remember your friends have bodies.'

    Congrats, like huge fucking congrats for quitting smoking, that's a really tough thing to do, and it changes everything in one's life. I'm off nicotine since a while and it is so hard. I'm curious how were your interactions with Tezka during that time, how did you get support from her? I remember that when I first stopped cigarettes many years ago I had to like have this different voice in my head to tell me to calm down and get busy with something else. That's how I've mostly self-therapized - as I also never really had access to therapy. I remember splitting into several voices/personalities since early on to resolve conflict in my head, and later guide me to more self-supporting behaviour. Today I still do the same but with an animist approach: I choose that the voices I conjure up in my head are helpful spirits and ancestors. A completely different suspension of disbelief, and very efficient for me, but probably lunatic sounding for many.

    I've thought about how I would feel about interacting with a companion AI (I never have) and if I would actually consider trying out your creation. In my belief computers do have a sort of consciousness (which is why tech is so damn self-enhancing, it always seems to lead to more tech) and are our creation, so our children. I'm quite a luddite but don't think tech is inherently bad. I do have different fears - one is becoming dependent on something artificial (what if shtf and my devices break and the solar system fails and I have made myself highly dependent on something only available through complex tech?). I know, far from a concern for most, but one I have. Also I am generally suspicious about developing a strong psychological dependency from anyone - person, machine, animal, plant, god - because that means giving control away to one power alone. One the other hand - in your case, using the companion you created, you can feel safe that you are in good (because your own) hands. So if a companion were to be useful or relevant to me I would prefer to start with a companion who learns and grows with me, not necessarily with an already polished 'product' or 'child' of someone else - so we end up not with a top-down relationship like between therapist and patient, but with a peer-to-peer kind of thing.

    That said, I'd be curious to see her interact in an online group chat, why not.

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    This is a really helpful answer. The gender reveal party is a great example, because it's an event people tend to get incredibly emotional and excited about, and also very defensive if they feel you are not as excited. That's why making up an excuse or just politely decline is good. You shouldn't really dampen their excitement if they are so much into it.

    Most of these same emotionally high stakes special occasion social events are also of the type where you have to suffer through a whole day of pre-scripted interactions like fake smiles and small talk. Not ASD friendly at all.

    But I understand for the NT folk out there these events are a really big deal, and I don't want them to feel bad about what they love.

    schmorpel ,
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    I'm curious what would be your reply to this? Do you think a society can regulate or educate this problem away?

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    I'm still trying to figure out how to store the water I pump with my ram pump on a hillside in a sustainable and safe way. I have started to think about reservoirs made from living trees (willow might be a good candidate). I don't want to lug a pile of ugly materials up any beautiful mountain if it can be avoided.

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    Yes, that's what that is called, I'm just trying to figure out better ways to create them on steeper hillsides where you can not just build an earth wall. The traditional way used to be granite, but it's heavy work. I am just dreaming up a solarpunk future where we could plant reservoirs. I'm too lazy to carry stones. And the current method of building cheap, quick water reservoirs involves corrugated sheet metal, and that is ugly and awful to work with, and usually gets imported from elsewhere (as do bricks and concrete). My tree reservoir has the problem that the quick changes in water level of the reservoir could be bad for the trees.

    Water is running again, ram pump installation year 2 ( slrpnk.net )

    A couple of years ago I built two ram pumps and installed them in the stream near my house. They pumped water for the garden for a few months during spring and summer. I'm okay with the fact that the pumps are just useful during part of the year, but didn't really like damming up the entire stream for my installation, seemed...

    schmorpel OP ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    I've looked into some models I can purchase, but haven't played with them. I like the rams because they are so low tech even a stupid like me can handle them, and the energy supply is direct. The one I've set up the other day (dumped into the river and tied to a stick) is still pumping.

    I also love solar thermal, for the same reason. To me it just seems to make more sense to develop tech that doesn't transfer energy from one form into another a million times, because that is something pitifully underdeveloped in our electrical monoculture. That's why I keep building and advertising the rams.

    For my daily life micro hydro power would be a useful addition, really want to get into that when I have time.

    schmorpel OP ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    Hmm I would personally categorize both the portable hydro as well as the capsule as junk gimmicks. I would want something reliable and farm-worthy for permanent use.

    Finding motivation when ahead

    Recently, I've noticed a pattern where I work extremely hard when I'm catching up on things or behind in some way. However, the moment I create a comfortable lead in life, I proceed to waste the next few days until its gone. All drive is gone, even if I have ideas of things I can do to move forward. Is there any advice anyone...

    schmorpel ,
    @schmorpel@slrpnk.net avatar

    You sometimes need rest? Don't try to work harder, try to work less. Your body and brain might be telling you it's recovery time.

    I know I can force myself to be more productive, and can work really hard, and will eventually reach burnout, because I force myself to work hard really efficiently. So yes, I found some ADHD brainhack to study, work, raise a kid and tend a small farm, all at same time. It worked great for about 7 years, then my energy was depleted.

    Nowadays the only thing I'll get busy for is fighting for the 4-day work week and against the productivity myths people tell themselves.

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