KarthNemesis

KarthNemesis , 1 month ago

I uh. Have no idea if this fulfills what you need, exactly, it's about a very specific facet of autism, but I've read this book and found it helpful for grounding how to navigate, self-care especially:
Unmasking Autism by Devon Price

I knew a lot of the information already, having built a lot of similar systems myself, but I feel it helped me feel less completely free-floating, based entirely in my own life theory with no contemporaries. I did learn some new things, as well, especially about wider context, safety, and how the stereotypes don't serve any of us all that well.

It is... a bit of a narrow focus, I don't know that it would give much information to those who aren't high-masking, I don't know that it would do much for someone who absolutely has to mask for safety. But if you struggle with high-masking and think there are probably at least some areas one could learn to let go, it is a decent reference. (Such as the case of me, who struggles with masking even in spaces I am completely alone, and suffering greatly because I have a lot of trouble letting go of what I "should be doing," and ending up perpetuating unwitting and unwilling violence against myself. Still working on that.)

I hope this might be helpful information, even if it was not precisely what you were looking for.

KarthNemesis , 1 month ago

I have autism and bipolar 1.

Autism does not have pills.
Circumstances of your birth have no causation to autism. Neither to circumstances of your life. All sorts of people have autism from all walks of life.

A reason to research and understand one's own autism is to recognize what in your life overwhelms you, and how to structure your life in a way that is comfortable and functional to you, without a judgemental neurotypical lens. To embrace who you are, rather than try to force yourself to be something you are not.

You can seek a diagnosis if you wish, but I can't tell you if it'd give you what you're looking for.

I learned about my conditions through following various mental health communities for years and seeing what had commonalities with me through the fun lens of dank memes. I also learned a lot about medications, warning signs in therapists, and I learned what mental health conditions I don't have. Can't say if that'd work for everyone, either, but I did learn a lot more from the communities directly rather than reading the clinical book definitions.

KarthNemesis , 1 month ago

To add to your statement, irritability is also a very common expression of bipolar.

KarthNemesis OP , 1 month ago (edited 1 month ago)

I read somewhere a long time ago that just because a term is in the form of an acronym, that doesn’t change what comes before it.

I was taught this as well, but unfortunately I think you and I were misled.
Still, they both sound "icky" to me, ha.

KarthNemesis OP , 1 month ago (edited 1 month ago)

literally neither was. they both looked and felt very alien.

i've pinned my suddenly having weird, "grammar is starkly bizarre" issues down to being a side effect of adjusting my meds. hoping that fades later.

edit: and also i do think your statement is a very practical answer in a general sense :)

KarthNemesis , 1 month ago

I'm allergic to polyester and most anything made of plastic. I get painful open sores, and hideously itchy. It is difficult to find clothes at best.
Plastic is snuck in more shit than you'd think. Often unlabelled. More than one pair of pants/shorts I've had to ditch/edit because the pockets were polyester or nylon in a "100% cotton" garment. Drawstrings are bad for this, too. And waistbands.

Seems to be weirdly common to be adverse to plastic-based fabrics in autistic communities.

I most often wear:

cotton/linen/canvas/denim
rayon/bamboo (plant based, do need to be a bit careful because people fake it, very loose "swishy" fabric)
hemp
real leather ("vegan leather" is literally plastic and i will fight people greenwashing calling it "vegan" and not the awful pleather it is.) (very difficult to find coats without nylon linings though.)

KarthNemesis , 1 month ago

Cork and fungus leather sounds absolutely sick. I hope fully plant-based leather catches on, because I haven't seen any anywhere.

From looking around, it looks like a lot of current plant stuff still tends to be mixed with polyurethane or coated with plastic 8i
(Polyurethane is, ...I don't think plastic. It's dense reading trying to figure out what exactly it is! But it seems to be mixed with plastic undisclosed sometimes? Regardless it doesn't seem great for me either...)

I'm glad that "the market" is moving further and further away from plastic as a whole in the past few years.
It sounds like there are some promising, but slow, developments in trying to make more pure plant leather.

(Would plant-leather be "planter?" "Planther?" /thonk.)

KarthNemesis , 1 month ago

i like my AMD ATI Radeon RX 5600. after I figured out it has a tiny tiny TINY hidden physical overclock switch they don't ever mention for some godforsaken reason (which is put "on" by default, also for some godforsaken reason) to turn off, it's the most stable graphics card i've ever used.
...i just recommend turning off the tiny evil hidden crash switch of doom.

amd in general is pretty chill on linux for a large portion of people.

KarthNemesis , 2 months ago

I heard some advice a while back that was along the lines of, "stop apologizing and start thanking," and I feel like it's positively impacted how I phrase things.

Instead of asking forgiveness and moving the conversation into them feeling they have to defend their values on the spot, showing gratitude for their understanding actually makes people feel more valued. "Thank you for your patience" is an entirely different vibe than "sorry I didn't get back to you" and puts much less burden on them. It shows you care about their time without making the focus about your failings and whether or not they agree they are failings.

It's subtle, but I find it's made a huge difference for me.

I also agree with others, in my experience apologies should be reserved for regret and actual feelings of penitence. It's actually a very strong value of mine nowadays, and it certainly makes me much healthier.

Just some thoughts about what I've learned about this particular situation, it's up to you how valid you think they are.