I can't believe I'm having to suggest this to someone... please actually go visit a brothel. Vanilla sex between couples are usually more passion focused so they won't have to give much attention on any particular sex move.
Sex workers however have to use their finesse to satisfy you because there was never any attraction or intimacy between either of you thus no passion to excite either of you. Just ask them to take the lead and find out.
Reactionary:relating to, marked by, or favoring reaction especially : ultraconservative in politics
Your takes are reactionary in a sociopolitical lens. Words can have more than one meaning.