shinigamiookamiryuu

@[email protected]

It’s nice to meet all you. I am she/her, can speak Toki Pona and English (non-natively), and locatable on Reddit as MozartWasARed. The links at discord.gg/sEuSSDz6TQ and deviantart.com/…/My-copyright-policy-and-the-impa… are pertinent to me.

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shinigamiookamiryuu ,

I think drugs are mutually exclusive from coolness or mental issues. Heck, animals sometimes consume drugs for recreation.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

No and I probably couldn't if I wanted to, with the caregivers gone and everyone else shunning me.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

Conscription, at least if you ask me, is acceptable if you benefit from the nation. If you live in a nation with a legal/healthcare system you cannot rely on, a social system that's not equal opportunity, etc. then you could argue it's wrong for them to draft you, but to those people who have their public sector serve them with high accommodations, yeah, go return the favor.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

I would still fight injustice but make it clear through my expression of doing so that I don't support the current regime anymore than I otherwise would. Countries should consider themselves gratefully lucky the world accepts their existence and I'm not joining a collective just to be in a one-way relationship.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

I was going to say 42.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

Love means feeling like the characteristics of someone or something inspire ease.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

What they mentioned is unusual. I'm sure some people somewhere pay, but it's against the norm and even against the rules. Some of us have to fight for even just the anonymity to be dropped.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

Not really, money probably doesn't exist in Heaven.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

That would be one short party if going by what one would call my denomination, Hell just being a temporary holding place if anything until purity has been achieved. In the context of any tradition, it sounds weird to think of Heaven as a place that for some reason needs a system of exchange when every demand is taken care of.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

Silence, it was usually my pose rather than the background noise that affected sleep. When I sleep, I often look like I was carried out of the chamber of secrets.

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    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    You think that of everyone though.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Before this thing people call anhedonia, I remember love felt like a bubbly feeling, like you had an internal compass made not of magnets but of your sweetest memories and an undying interest to form more, and it always pointed to the ones I loved. Remnants of that died once and for all with my mum recently (who I loved even during anhedonia) and that caused every remaining relationship to collapse. Today I feel like I'm surrounded by NPC's, and sadly not the kind who'll say they want to be a Blitzball when they grow up.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    How does one absolutely know here that a certain person is a certain other person?

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    What happened in Ace Ventura Pet Detective?

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Having not seen the scene until recently by coincidence, based on the description, I thought it was more like an "incels can't handle this" joke, but then saw it and saw it was used as the smoking gun for an embarrassing guilty verdict. It definitely has "this movie director has an axe to grind" vibes.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I mean, it's technically the police force's fault for being so "into" her in the first place.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    My reaction anytime I watch something with Jim Carrey. He was like a fad we just keep now for the novelty, no offense to him.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Do you mean conspiracies we believe or conspiracies about us?

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I wish I knew. I'm not motivated enough about life to fantasize.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    But I don't feel like anything in particular. If someone were to tell me to "just do it" a trillion different random things have equal potential to come to mind. Should I tour the toothpick factory because that's "a thing to do while alive", as opposed to trying out at the tiddlywinks championship? That's the issue, nothing that I would expect to be able to do draws me.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Only the king of all trends.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I was in the Battle of B-r5rb under the Halloween Coalition (and won, cue the wrath of former N3 Coalitionaires and Pandemic Legionaires). This actually technically makes me a war veteran.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    They don't get fat, they just get longer or larger overall.

    Once most cocoon species hatch into their respective moth, the moth is unable to eat by its own design, slowly dying of starvation over a few weeks, which is why the moths in your bedrooms just get smaller and smaller until they seem to vanish. Poor little guys :(

    Now apply that in reverse. An insect that eats is just going to look like a bigger insect. Same goes for when they're pregnant. If insects got fat, leaving a mound of sugar outside for them to eat would lead to fat ones, but instead they just eat themselves to death.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I may be cheating when I say this, but I bounced back after losing a parent only to un-bounce back because of how people responded to it.

    What's the story you would write if you were an author?

    A lot of people worldbuild when they daydream and have the bones of a story kicking around in their brain, but have to pay the bills and raise the kids etc so they never flesh it out and write it down. What's your story's premise? Fantasy, sci-fi, alternate history, mystery, western, whatever genre.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I'm already an author.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    No, I was referring to the title which I thought referred to "if" I was an author. Though very, very few of my writings are fiction and most are vents/guides.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    The only justification I can think of for vandalizing a library is that the books are all guides on how to commit vandalism.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I'll tell you when any happen.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Who you love is ultimately up to you. Some people still have love for their parents despite strictness, others might place the bar lower than you describe. That isn't to say I encourage physical discipline, I'm only saying people have different priorities. I probably faced what people today would call an unacceptable category of discipline, but either way was and am too distracted by how I mention society treats me to care.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I just find ways to combine them all and multi-task whenever possible.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    You're looking at it.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Harry Potter. People often talk about a "golden age" of JK Rowling, and I think to myself, what golden age? Harry Potter, both the character and the books, are written like a hyperinflated Cinderella, complete with an attempt at discriminatory apologetics that would make CS Lewis say "you okay bro?"

    Also, Luke Skywalker. People hate Anakin for being whiny and weak and Rey for being a Mary Sue, but Luke is both and nobody complains.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    The Red Turtle was designed for this.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Hopefully the computers of today can still run it.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    They're like the dragon scroll, they reflect as much of your true destiny as you're able to see in yourself.

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    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    What country are you from?

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Which one?

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Green apples.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Due process. Freaking due process. Or the scientific method or whatever you want to call it.

    What do I mean to be implied by saying this? Suppose you encounter a situation where accusations are thrown around. Normally this starts by asking what the claim is before talking further about what is wrong with the action in question plus what separates it from hearsay. You might consult testimony/proofs/cross-examination for this, with some of this being more defining/damning than others. Things like you'd see in 12 Angry Men, like "you just said X when you're now saying Y", "what makes this indication of what happened, inarguable enough to not be found within reasonable doubt", and "you have all this testimony on one hand and the physical remnants telling us another thing".

    In short, it's supposed to be instinctual that what people want to do is to mark the truth via scrutiny when it would otherwise blend in with everything else.

    Alright, so you might be asking what I mean when I say this as my answer. The pen being mightier than the sword is not an idiom that anyone should have to say, but seldom has someone here ever had any issue randomly walking up to a crowd and making damning remarks about someone they don't like and instantly denting another individual in ways that should matter. Relatedly, someone might have what they insist is solid indication of something but isn't for the very fact that it's arguable and leaves room for doubt.

    I've seen an individual in particular do this, they go up to people and say "this person is a pedo", they then go up to another crowd, same thing, they say "this person is a pedo". Usually it has some super long elaboration too, complete with a mixture of things without solid indicators, things with no indicators, and actions which were already compensated for years ago. People in charge typically know better, but the common people have this idea in their mind that "this is a damning claim, logically it wouldn't exist for no reason", like have you ever seen a spiteful ex before? I myself am an arguable victim of this, chronically on numerous occasions, in all spheres of life, being unable to do so much as engage in hobbies without the paparazzi wannabe we know as the human populace chiming in. Sometimes they'll even pull the "well then prove the rumors are false" card which requires that you can prove a negative (which would make it not a negative in the first place). The social equivalent of chopping down trees so that I have to walk over them while walking on a path, hoping one day maybe a branch will jab me or something.

    One day a few of us asked about this and the response every time was "it's human nature to forego due process if someone can sense due process would be dishonorable", and that was one of the last straws that led to my misanthropy and the fact that, in a profound way, I detest the very essence of humanity, and why I often contrast neurodivergence with human nature, because it's often those of us who are neurodivergent who are considered as having the lesser states of mind. I beg to differ, we're not the ones who are showing how profoundly self-defeating we are. One might say I've even self-reflected months at a time just to contemplate if maybe I was the asshole. I'm sure I am the asshole sometimes, but that doesn't mean a learned person cannot see the holes. And people wonder why I feel sorry for the ultra stigmatized.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I may only dream of such a world where it was that simple. Some would say one's will and inspiration to frame an individual suffices as a foundation. To use a metaphor, it's a very Corenlius-Evazan-esque situation but without a jedi to retaliate and with the whole bar (representing the known world) in on it. The stigma is also contagious in a way, the few people who see things for what they are being lumped in with me, often not even intentionally. The suspicion for me was always pre-existing, based on trivial things about me that brought to mind misconceptions, and it just possesses new forms it seems, no matter how collateral, never shrinking because it takes a self-feeding form. Sometimes it's like the minds of the world have been hacked because one minute I might be explaining such a thing to them and being told I'm being agreed with, and the next, they're being confronted by an antagonizer who barely says two words to them about the conspiracy theory of what I've done that I just got done alluding to as what it is, even involving positions of authority on occasion, and suddenly they've been wololo'd. So avoiding fulfilling the object of their fears does little to quell anything.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Does all that come with instructions on what if the other side starts spinning it and making the case that you're operating by this MO?

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Where?

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    However you see yourself, it's welcome in our eyes.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I wish for ten more wishes.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Make one. I'll join.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    I'd enjoy my family more.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    It fluctuates because there are a few factors at play, two of them being my stigma and the condition itself. They might gaze at me for the visual appeal while looking down on me in every other sense of the word, they might treat me with kindness but not care about what they see because my condition turns them off, or anything in between. Typically, though, they aren't attracted to me. Some level of stigma has always been with me since birth though, it's not like my state of being which came later.

    shinigamiookamiryuu ,

    Several exist.

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