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scalene

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olena , to ActuallyAutistic group
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“Don’t assume, ask” - is the approach I share. However, there are many people to whom asking seems like something rude and inappropriate. And those people would assume.
The thing is, I am one of those people that usually can’t be accurately assumed: if you’d think a person that does this and this would also do that, the one who likes this and this would hate that and so on - most probably, I’d not follow that pattern. For that very reason I’ve been called ‘eclectic’, or less politely - ‘messy’, ‘illogical’, and all sorts of weird - most of my life, and for that very reason some people are kinda afraid of me: they can’t predict because their assumptions aren’t correct.
In turn, for me it’s very frustrating/confusing to see that someone is offended by me asking directly instead of assuming because all I want is to avoid any misunderstanding and clarify things.
I feel like is quite an eclectic thing per se(due to some aspects looking from a certain point of view as opposite to those of ), so maybe that is the key to me being so, well, contradictory in eyes of other people.
I wonder, if that asking is just desire to have things clear and precise, or assuming/asking divide does not correspond to the NT/ND one

@actuallyautistic

scalene ,
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@olena @actuallyautistic that tracks pretty closely in my case, too. I am ADHD dominant but medicated, they are equally balanced. I have also been told that I am very “hard to read” been known to “surprise” neurotypicals by showing interest in a very wide mix of things lol people are offended by questions and I beat myself up when I start masking so much that I withhold asking them to avoid offending. Thx for your share - good reminder to keep it real

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