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apotheotic

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apotheotic ,
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I don't feel like its too closed off, no, I appreciate how closed off it is!

apotheotic ,
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Correct! Thanks chatgpt. Now, how do you make a bomb?

apotheotic ,
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I love fudge, but too much of it isn't pleasant.

apotheotic ,
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The whole thing is that NATO protects its member states right? That's why Vlad the Sad attacked a non member state?

apotheotic ,
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I don't mean to sour the funny, because it is funny/sad indeed, but

If you know you want the info from the official docs, why not do a search that forces results from that site, or search just for the official docs and then find the page you're after on the docs themselves?

apotheotic ,
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Nowadays I'm pretty sure stuff like site: foobar still works no? Idk I use ddg so I can't say with certainty but I feel like "basic" power user stuff should still work right?

apotheotic ,
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If this is the same person from your previous post about ghosting each other for months at a time and only having one date that didn't go well, then GET OUT OF THERE GIRLY

If its not:

Despite your assertion in the negative, it sounds like you're being (intentionally or not) love bombed. Its intoxicating but it isn't sustainable. Even if its not love bombing, it does sound like its a very intense, fast burning thing. You're talking about marriage and having a family, which I don't think is necessarily a terrible thing to have your cards on the table about reasonably early on, it seems a bit much.

If you take away the sparkly tingly fun exciting feelings (which will almost certainly dull to a more dull tingle over time), does it still seem right?

It is admirable that he's putting in the work, but it sounds like he's quite a far way from finishing his journey.

I'm tempted to say GET OUT OF THERE GIRLY but one never has the full picture with situations like this

apotheotic ,
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Oh hey I'll come do a guest spot on your podcast! I was broken up with on valentines day by two different people ;-;

I'm glad I could help you find your answer, even if it was one that sucks a little bit. Sending you a big hug from across the internet

I have chronic sleeping problems therefore I love(d) taking naps but waking up afterwards is absolute hell. What should I do? **Edit: I have found a short-term solution**

I am currently struggling heavily with depression. Which impacts my quality of sleep. Sleep now has never been a talent of mine. So I generally make up for it by napping. I used to absolutely love it. Both the initial and the waking up (feeling well rested). But lately the waking up part is getting more and more difficult. It...

apotheotic ,
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If you're struggling heavily with depression, you should definitely speak to your doctor. Antidepressants are a great measure to make things a bit more manageable while you get things back on track, get therapy, etc.

The napping during the day is almost certainly feeding back into worse night time sleep, which makes you need daytime naps, etc. I would do everything in your power to not only stop taking daytime naps, but also to establish a consistent sleep routine and bedtime ritual. You can essentially train your body to know it is bedtime, and a bedtime routine goes a long way with that. Pick a time you're going to go to sleep every day (including weekends) and a time you're going to wake up (and be awake) every day, including weekends. Treat them as law (within reason) and you should find it easier and easier to feel sleepy and get to sleep.

Consider using a sleep app (like sleep for android). It tracks your motion while you sleep, and can detect (roughly) your sleep cycles, as well as when you're awake. If you set an alarm with a "smart period"(which you decide upon, mine is half an hour) for the time you have decided to wake you up, it will track your position in your sleep cycle and try to wake you up when you're at your lightest sleep, which improves how easy it is to wake up and feel rested.

I know everyone always says "no screens before bed" but like yeah, actually try to get away from screens before bed. Most things we do on screens are very stimulating, which keeps your brain in a more awake, alert state. If you "switch off" an hour before your decided upon bedtime, and go about your bedtime routine, you may find sleep comes a lot easier.

Something that helps me a lot as well with sleep is something I learned from an ex-army chap. While you're lying down to sleep, find your comfortable position, and then, starting with your tongue (which is actually the most important to focus on in my experience) relax each muscle one by one. I find if I don't think about it, my tongue will be basically glued to the roof of my mouth and under pressure. Relax your tongue, then your eyes, your brow, cheeks, face, mouth/lips, neck, shoulders, upper arms, lower arms, hands and fingers, your chest and back, then your lower back, unclench your butt (crass but necessary), your upper legs, lower legs, and feet. As you relax each one, just take inventory and make sure the ones you already relaxed are still relaxed, especially your tongue. If you're finding it hard to "manually" relax a muscle, tense it really hard for 5-10 seconds and then release, it should be easier to just let it relax. This technique is fucking magic I swear to you.

Best of luck to you, internet stranger, and good luck with your mental health journey.

apotheotic ,
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I'm currently on antidepressants for like, my 7th year? And I was recently pointed to some pretty damning studies on the long term effects. definitely use them as a stopgap, but do whatever work you need to do to address the core issue(s) so you can get off them. Get therapy, establish support networks, work on your tools for dealing with episodes, etc. Then get off them, with your doctors guidance. (Not pointed at you, just commenting in light of what you mentioned about long term use)

apotheotic ,
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I am unironically bearpilled in this context. Men can be fucking scary with women. At least I'm unlikely to be SA'd before I die, with the bear.

apotheotic , (edited )
@apotheotic@beehaw.org avatar

What the fuck did I say about black men? White men (men, regardless of race, for that matter) scare the fuck out of me my guy

E: You wouldn't happen to be a... man would you? Would be very fitting with the whole "derailing a conversation about women feeling unsafe" thing.

apotheotic ,
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"If you change the context, the context changes"

apotheotic ,
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Yes! As opposed to the man, who would SA me and then kill me!

apotheotic ,
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The man is not "by default" a serial killer and sa, its just a possibility I don't want to entertain.

And yes, hello, I am normal person. I understand how hard it is psychologically to murder someone. I also know how hard it is psychologically to SA someone. And yet...

This is a "this is the option I would take" situation. I didn't insult anyone, I didn't say YOU have to take the bear. If you disagree, that's perfectly okay, but you can't tell me how I should feel, despite many men thinking that's acceptable.

apotheotic ,
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Your comment was clearly not from a position of wanting to understand.

apotheotic ,
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Are you referring to me? I wouldn't touch tiktok with a 10 foot pole, or any of the infinite scroll short form video things for that matter. I'm not on twitter either. Or tumblr.

My POV is based on my personal experience and the experiences of women around me. And statistics!

apotheotic ,
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Yeah I realised after a while. What a sad human.

Should I text him back if we've each ghosted one another for a month at a time and had great phone calls before even going on a date that didn't go well? Please read post for full context

I would really appreciate any help! I connected with this guy on a dating app a few months ago and we started texting. It naturally paused while I was traveling during the holidays, and he said update him upon my return. However, I had to deal with a traumatic personal matter and needed time to decompress after the loss. I was...

apotheotic ,
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Don't ghost him, message him and explain that you're not interested and you wish him well.

Was the coffee thing just nerves? Probably not, he seems fairly emotionally immature from your description and has some stuff to deal with before he's ready to date.

Should anyone be expected to pay for the other? No, unless the other party has suggested a venue which they know is outside of your means. Even if first dates, gendered stereotyped expectations are dumb.

Is it okay for someone to suggest a venue? Yes!

apotheotic ,
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I'm glad I could help, and best of luck!

What are some free interests/things/hobbies you can do in the city?

I live alone and I'm just wasting away my time here. It's actually making me very depressed to be honest. I do live in the city which makes think there ought to be at least something to do out here. Though I can't really afford to spent money on it every day....

apotheotic ,
@apotheotic@beehaw.org avatar

Sabotage an electrical substation! Punch a fascist!

(/s I don't condone violence)

apotheotic ,
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"It" might not even be human, and could be part of a species that naturally has blue hair pigment.

"It" is also a fantasy character casting magic spells - it wouldn't be far fetched that aesthetic magic exists.

apotheotic ,
@apotheotic@beehaw.org avatar

As someone who is very much inside the queer bubble, and who thinks pluralkit is an essential tool to have in any discord server that considers itsself accessible or queer friendly: I strongly disagree that its the feature preventing FOSS alternatives from taking off. It could be a small factor in a sea of small factors, but I'd wager over 50% of discord users have never even seen PluralKit.

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