@catswhocode@ashleyspencer@actuallyautistic
Welcome, there’s no magic formula as you need to find your own. I try to turn tasks into adventures or awareness experiences, remembering to breath, remembering to make food ahead so I can manage to eat, stay hydrated, throw in some kind of self love.
It can just be having a few moments outside. Depression hits eventually. So untimely it’s not just the burnout. I also learned to think differently. Be more selective of what thoughts I thought.
@catswhocode@ashleyspencer@actuallyautistic
The best hack I have ever done is what I told you.Plus consuming less energy. This means lighter masking. Less friction with life. Kind of testing boundaries under different conditions. I also keep a journal.
Try to be kind to yourself. As far as we know we just get one life.
May as well make it comfortable . We are resilient survivors and the now is perhaps what we make it. Perspective or world view shape reality.
@punishmenthurts@ashleyspencer@actuallyautistic
Well I’m just writing from perspective. I think I already said I did meditation sessions to where I went into memories and comforted and thanked myself through the traumatic times for doing the best I could with what I knew and basically hugged the smaller me. I did that over a period of months. Each time I honestly feel a little better.
It feels like those aren’t wounds anymore. I’m grateful for all of it. It’s a work in progress in experience
@actuallyautistic
I don't know if it's related to the hypo-/hypersensitivity topic, stimulation or whatsoever. But I really like strong tasting stuff. Spicy, salty, hot, sour, complex, whatsoever.
After just now taking a sip from a pickle glass it came to my mind that I even took shots of vinegar in the past, because I liked the taste. I considder it so odd that I wondered if anybody out there did it too.
I consider it good to spruce up designs, how space is used.
I break my own systems to function with less energy.
I threw away most of my masks.
If I misplace it I used to rewind memory.
I’ve tried to switch to awareness and organization for myself. It’s difficult haha. I am also audhd. recovering from burnout.
I also find when I respond versus react to a thing being out of place things work out better for me
@pathfinder@yourautisticlife@actuallyautistic
😂 well at least on Sony headphones… bought through conventional channels. I’m skeptical about buying a used pair for 100 lol 😂 that’s how much they are over here on auction sites.
I love sharing my struggles here and getting support. This community is so wholesome. I am in the mood for some positivity! What are good things my @actuallyautistic neuropeers are thankful for today? #autisticadult
@miaoue@yourautisticlife@actuallyautistic
Theory of mind is basically self acknowledgement and awareness that you are an embodied organism that exists within an ecosystem of diversity with other organisms and understand your purpose as human. To me it’s knowing what you are in the principal sense in science, that you acknowledge and accept responsibility of your being, via agency.
Which perhaps is similar to early metacognition dating back awhile ago.
I could be entirely off too!☺️
@academicchatter @academicsunite @neuroscience
I ran across these articles, I thought it may helpful for future scientists and educators, perhaps a alternative frame for others
In which direction do you think the field should go? What influence do you want to see more of? And how much should you let your own personal preferences and interests guide your decision?
I constantly struggle because my brain has made connections that are not obvious to others, and when I try to guide them through my thinking I confuse them with details or by skipping explanations that seem obvious to me but completely surprising to anyone else.
@Susan60@woozle@CynAq@mariyadelano@actuallyautistic@actuallyadhd
Susan lol it wasn’t you I read all the options and opinions when I first woke and was like well I kinda identify all over the place I try to adapt like a water element but I have to not let myself get distracted lol. I just thought to myself ok no time for thinking programming methods on the fly with meta cognition .
Yeah it’s weird because I have to ask myself how I really do feel lol.
@Susan60@woozle@CynAq@mariyadelano@actuallyautistic@actuallyadhd
Wow thats incredible…it takes awhile to get there. It’s forever a work in progress for me. It’s like a mind body embodiment and seeing yourself in realtime but from different perspectives and then combine. There some tricks to exponential change I maybe found. I just mean some choices you make have almost have propagation proponents for them.
@Uair@actuallyautistic
Love love love most animals…
I once had a barking growling guard dog break its tether and tackle me, it was about 125 lb Rottweiler, my only causality was whatever gooping amount of slobber my face ingested while sugar proceeded to try lick my face off seemingly.
My friend said sugar has never done that with anyone. I think they felt a little betrayed or something.
humans are ok animals, …I prefer some to others.
I have issues with the "top-down ( purported to be most NTs)" and "bottom-up (purported to be most autistics)" thinking binary.
I don't think these labels identify the differences as I believe this is an issue of motivation and value judgement.
Let's take the common example of essay writing for school. The story goes "when they asked us to write an outline, the NT students got right on it while the ND kids were bewildered because how could they write a bullet point version of an essay that didn't exist yet."
This makes intuitive sense to everyone who experienced the frustration of being asked to write that outline so we connect over this and give this as an example of our "thinking style" difference from the NT population.
If we actually think about this a little, though, the example, while a common experience, doesn't actually demonstrate how our thinking differs.
First, NTs and NDs both need to acknowledge the concept of an essay. If we then say "the NTs get right on writing the outline when asked to do so, which means their brain started from the concept of an essay, then automagically filled it out with a list of section titles, then guided their person through the acts necessary to fill out those sections," does this sufficiently explain what is happening? After all, the ND people can write research essays, and without coming up with an outline first too!
I think there's something deeper going on here. I think, the main difference is priorities, not the method of thinking.
In my opinion, when asked to write an essay, most NT people respond by asking "why" or even "what's in it for me" first, and since the school structure pre-answers that question for them, move onto "how," which is also formalized for their convenience: "start by thinking of possible questions and reword them as titles, put them in a list. This way, you won't have to experience the inconvenience of being curious for once." The entire process is optimized for form over substance.
In the same situation, putting the curiosity first, most ND people respond by "<insert every question possible>", and concluding "I'm going to start looking into it." No instruction necessary because the ND brain here optimized the question asking part of the endeavor. The information will be gathered and new questions will form and then more information will be gathered until there's too much of it and..." Yeah... "why are we doing this again?" Notice the "how" isn't very important here, even though it's included in the "every question possible" because after all, what can be more natural than making observations and learning other people's observations and then putting them into a report of facts? Substance rules, and form will emerge as a necessity.
So, I like thinking about "substantial (substance first)" and "formal (form first)" modes of thinking rather than "bottom-up" vs "top-down".
If you're still reading, thanks!
I'm curious as to what everyone else thinks about this issue :)
@CynAq@onezero@actuallyautistic
🤨 academia seems like labyrinth of seeming counter intuitive mechanics and of course there’s the economics and politics.
I’m pretty sure that’s why there’s a big disconnect between me having a degree or not having a degree.
Yet I love nature and science. I feel so conflicted most of the time. I like institutions like SFI that are more intra disciplinary.
I’m just trying to figure it out really. I have no problem with learning. My IO is a little skewed😀
@lydiaschoch@actuallyautistic@actuallyadhd glad you liked it! 🥰It’s one of my all time favorites, it carried me well through a lot of soul searching moments, especially when I have been trying to figure something out, so I thought some others may relate.
No matter how well I learnt to mask, no matter how well I learnt to get on with people, if not in any deep and meaningful way, at least superficially. There has always been one skill that I have never mastered and that is simply the ability to not upset people and especially without having the slightest idea how.
Or that I didn't for a long time, anyway. It was only when I realised that I was autistic and that the way I looked at the world was in some ways substantively different from the way many allistics looked at the world, that I began to understand something. Allistics tend to find validation externally, through feedback from the group or the part of society that they identify with, whereas autistics tend to find it within themselves, in their own reason and sense of worth and value.
Now I must stress that in many respects this is a generalisation and obviously there will be a lot of variation and degree in how true this is. But in its more extreme forms, it could very well explain many of the experiences and difficulties that I've had.
Because if someone's self-worth, the value they see in their life and actions, is almost entirely based on their interactions with the dynamics of the group they identify with, or the society they live within and not from their own judgement, then this could lead to certain choices and reactions that are quite frankly alien to someone like me and that I could easily end up in conflict with and all without really trying to.
For example, if the value of a child reflects back on its parents. Then in the extreme case the values and behaviour expected from that child, are not those of the child, but of the parents in terms of the group the child is meant to be representing them in and how well it is doing that. So any sense of divergence from that or criticism of that child, no matter how slight that might be, could easily be seen as an attack on the parents and reacted to accordingly, irrespective of how reasonable or just it was.
Equally, of course, worth, praise, or rewards, can also become divorced from any sense of reality. All that matters is that you, whether that's through your children or not, are being valued, not whether there is any justice to it. Because the truth or validity of it, is not based on how you see yourself, but only on how others see you. And in the extreme case, it doesn't even matter how they came to this view, as long as they have it. So worth can become something to be manipulated and played for and how you really are and how you actually feel about yourself becomes almost irrelevant to this process.
That people could even be this way, that everything could become how you're being perceived and anything that effects that negatively can be something to be attacked, is still something that I struggle to understand. It is so foreign to my nature. But, it certainly explains so many of the times that I've upset people, because I wasn't playing this game, or seeing the world the way I should and didn't even realise it.
@pathfinder@actuallyautistic I struggled with that a year ago and decided I could do better if I was kinder to myself and I didn’t need validation from a person as much as I did myself. I also realized I couldn’t help myself if I couldn’t learn who I was as a person owning my decisions now. I remember a saying “the relationship we have with our selves is reflective in the relationship we have with others”. With Kindness Humility
@pathfinder@actuallyautistic
Oh wait the actual wording was “the relationship we have with ourselves is the energy in which all other relationships energy flows”
@pathfinder@AnAutieAtUni@actuallyautistic
My experience was less than pleasant. I really loved school. No idea what happened, they always spoke of potential, but they couldn’t see what was going on under the hood. Hell, I didn’t even understand why I felt the way I did :)
