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Aerliss

@[email protected]

Talks to animals. Sometimes they listen.

Cafe manager. Autistic. Migraine spoonie. Crochets. Practices kyudo from time to time. Edinburgh based Brummy who spent her formative years in the Welsh countryside.

Current obsessions; Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss, The Hoof GP, Death Stranding, Shadows at the Door, Percy Jackson (am on Battle of the Labyrinth).

White cishet learning to be an ally.

Header; two pale bunnies with darker splotches looking at the camera.

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PossiblyAutistic , to ActuallyAutistic group

Took the referral from the company psychlogist recommending diagnosis for ADHD and ASD to my GP, got a referral to a psychiatrist and a name, called that one today, and surprisingly have an appointment in 1.5 weeks ... 😯

Any advice?

@actuallyautistic

Aerliss ,
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@PossiblyAutistic @dzwiedziu @actuallyautistic yeah, they don't use physical diagnostics for ASD and ADHD. Maybe some might look at brain MRIs? But liver function?

Afaia all diagnostic criteria is behavioural and psychological. Physiological differences haven't made it into the books yet.

Aerliss ,
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@riley @PossiblyAutistic @dzwiedziu @actuallyautistic In my greatest and most wild dreams all tools would be used to get a dx, or at least figure out treatment for symptoms, if desired/needed. At the moment too much weight is given to observed behaviour, at least by first line practitioners. We see people every week here talking about being denied a referral, or learning they were misdiagnosed based on observed behaviour.

And it takes so looooong. Just get a pee test sorted already 😆

Aerliss ,
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@dzwiedziu @PossiblyAutistic @actuallyautistic I was thinking more for purely diagnostic reasons, but you're right a liver function test might be used for medication decisions.

chevalier26 , to ActuallyAutistic group
@chevalier26@mastodon.social avatar

@actuallyautistic Another day of being told I’m “British” and “don’t understand U.S. weather” on social media because I don’t enjoy summer time and temps above about 72°F because of sensory issues. Have to school them right back by telling them I’m from the southern U.S. 😂

Aerliss ,
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@chevalier26 @actuallyautistic that's not even THAT hot in the UK. We can expect to hit that through the hottest part of the year, and I'm in Scotland.

Too hot for me, but I start complaining at 18c/64f. Summer can get in the sea 😆

Aerliss ,
@Aerliss@mastodon.social avatar

@pathfinder @chevalier26 @actuallyautistic hah, that would describe my dad well (though we're from the Midlands). I'm more of a leaf litter gnome. I don't have the grace or poise to pull off elf...

chevalier26 , to ActuallyAutistic group
@chevalier26@mastodon.social avatar

@actuallyautistic Just found out that NT people have REAL habits that happen basically on autopilot. This is news to me.

What most NT people think of as a "habit" I think of as a "task," even if it is a part of my routine. For example, brushing and flossing my teeth is a part of my daily routine, but I have to make myself think about each action separately. I wouldn't call them habits because I literally remind myself to do them every night. It isn't automatic.

Aerliss ,
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@Uair @joshsusser @chevalier26 @actuallyautistic I don't think many group activities are pointless. I think a fair whack don't fulfil their point (The Olympics) or are actively harmful (hazing).

A lot of group activities, whether ritual or less formulaic (a ritual is just a series of actions always performed in the same way) are group bonding (singing around a campfire, saluting the haggis) or mark a stage in life (bar/bat mitzvah). Some are simply fun (clapping games, ceilidh dancing).

chevalier26 , to ActuallyAutistic group
@chevalier26@mastodon.social avatar

@actuallyautistic Do y'all know if it's an autistic trait to be super skeptical of stuff? Like, for example, my parents watch some questionable "health" people on YouTube, and when they show me a video from said people, I can tell IMMEDIATELY that they are grifters in it for money. Idk what gives it away but it's like a flashing warning sign in my brain.

I wonder if it has to do with social influence and the effects of charisma/agreeableness that NDs might not fall for.

Aerliss ,
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@chevalier26 @actuallyautistic slight aside, but the "people in your area are buying" tabs on food delivery apps suddenly make sense. To me it was ridiculous. I don't care what that my neighbour ordered ribs. I'm vegan! I have my own preferences.

But these things work on NTs, don't they?

DoomsdaysCW , to ActuallyAutistic group
@DoomsdaysCW@kolektiva.social avatar

So, it's cool enough that I finally have the urge to put on my zippered hooded sweatshirt again. Part of my involves being comfortable with fabric against my skin -- and not having that (and having to wear short sleeve shirts) has been unbearable. That means it's way too hot for me.
cc: @actuallyautistic

Aerliss ,
@Aerliss@mastodon.social avatar

@DoomsdaysCW @actuallyautistic have to wear socks, but hate wearing shoes indoors. Very much dislike having bare legs unless it's very hot. Absolutely hate skirts and dresses, especially if I'm outside. I wear light, summery trousers all year. I'm okay with short sleeves but usually wear a cardi or shirt over a T.

CynAq , to ActuallyAutistic group
@CynAq@neurodifferent.me avatar

@actuallyautistic

Question to the community about a reaction I had a few minutes ago:

So I’m watching this stream of a guy playing a video game and talking to his chat when someone asks about another game. The streamer raves about that game like he clearly adored the shit out of it, then calls it “one of the better RPGs for sure”.

This pissed me off enough to surprise me.

Is “sounding nuanced and wise” a popular look? Is this what it is? I mean, you clearly think that game is the bees knees. Would it hurt to put a little faith behind your statement and say it is one of the best? It’s your opinion after all. Is it that much out of fashion to make bold sounding statements about things that ultimately don’t matter?

I keep reading and hearing these half assed statements in the form of “one of the better (or more)” instead of best (or most) much more frequently lately compared to a few years ago.

My question is, have any of you also noticed a certain reluctance to state strong opinions from people online, especially popular streamers and such?

Aerliss ,
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@CynAq @actuallyautistic "hardcore" gamers are some of the most vitriolic and reactionary assholes. Remember GamerGate, and how the only reason the journo they hated didn't get murdered was because the guy on the way to do it crashed his car? All because she gave the wrong games good or bad reviews.

I wouldn't want to rile up those people either. I'd be softening my statements. It's the same reason women use a lot of soft statements like "well, maybe if" & "hmm, I think". Pre-emptive defence.

yourautisticlife , to ActuallyAutistic group
@yourautisticlife@mast.yourautisticlife.com avatar

@actuallyautistic

Another autistic trait.... maybe...

I'm left-handed. Left-handedness correlates with neurodivergence.

I also have difficulty recognizing left and right. The labels appear arbitrary to me. If everyone swapped them around, we'd still be able to operate.

I've talked about the above before, but here's a new one.

If you ask me to put down cutlery at a table, you can toss a coin as to whether I'm going to do it right or wrong.

I'm probably going to flip everything, unless I reflect that I'm likely to flip everything and go against my initial impulse.

I cannot count the number of times this caused friction with my father. My ex-wife was nicer and gently corrected me.

Aerliss ,
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@yourautisticlife @actuallyautistic I have a lot of freckles. Their positions are how I learnt my right from my left.

The labels are arbitrary. & yeah, if we all swapped them it wouldn't make a difference. But we'd ALL have to swap them. It's like the order of the alphabet. It's arbitrary, & seems unimportant until you're trying to find something in an alphabetical list, like a book on a shop shelf, or an encyclopedia entry. It's because we all agree & adhere that makes it work.

Aerliss ,
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@yourautisticlife @actuallyautistic don't get me started on cutlery. It does not matter what spoon you consume soup with except on a personal level. We do not all need to use the same spoon. I like shallow, pointed spoons. "Dessert" spoons. But noooo, they're only for dessert. Gaaaahd, who came up with these rules? Get a hobby!

🤣🤣🤣

Aerliss ,
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@yourautisticlife @actuallyautistic on left and right...

Now my left side feels lighter, smaller. Which ruined a renowned skeptic's bit during a talk where he was showing how easy it is to manipulate people. Basically you close your eyes & put your arms out in front of you. Then you're told you have a pile of books on one, & a helium balloon tied to the other. Gradually the balloon hand rises & the book hand falls. He put the balloon on right, & books on left. My left rose & my right dropped 🤣

LehtoriTuomo , to ActuallyAutistic group
@LehtoriTuomo@mementomori.social avatar

Someone asked whether I ever played Doom. No, not really. I told that I've never liked first person shooters and then it hit me. I never liked them as there's too much going on. In fact, I've never been a big fan of any types of shooters, the only exception being Cannon Fodder. Now, with the new-found autistic perspective, it makes perfect sense. Sensory overdrive all the time equals no fun. How about my fellow autistics, any fans of shooters?

@actuallyautistic

Aerliss ,
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@LehtoriTuomo @actuallyautistic shooters, yes. Not so big on first person unless it's with a light gun. I prefer third person, top down, or ye older side scrollers. But sometimes the overall game is worth it. I love Borderlands.

I should note that I am not very good at them. Fair to middling, maybe. Running away is a valid tactic 🤣

LehtoriTuomo , to ActuallyAutistic group
@LehtoriTuomo@mementomori.social avatar

I've been trying to understand what it means that an autistic brain is bombarded with so much information. We spent some time at our summer cottage and I think I got some insight in this.

Instead of seeing the lake in front of my eyes, everywhere I looked I saw a detail. Its size would vary but it would still be a detail. A swan there, its partner there, no leaves on that tree yet, what a cool pattern on the small waves, what does it look like when I move my eyes this way, or that way, a car on the opposite shore, the shadow of the tree, I wonder what seagulls those are etc. A new detail with every single glance.

At the same time my attention tried to keep track of the dog and listened to birds singing and bumblebees flying around.

Now I wonder what it feels like just to see the lake.

@actuallyautistic

Aerliss ,
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@LehtoriTuomo @actuallyautistic this is why we make the best beach combers. I can spot the cool rocks & shells way before anyone else... and all my friends are ND of one blend or another.

I think it's also why I often find injured wildlife. I found an injured pigeon squab sitting on a busy path and not one person even seemed to take notice of it. Just walked right past it. I can't help noticing the out of place little grey & brown blobs that are trying to hide.

Aerliss ,
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@LehtoriTuomo @actuallyautistic our brains don't have a "junk" folder. Everything gets sent to inbox with a notification, just to make sure 😆

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