Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 248 , Tuesday 02/07/2024
I had a rough night last night - up at 03:33 , the human mind loves patterns hence the time stuck.
A really restless night, but a had a good chat with the CCDP 🧚♀️ while she got ready to start work on her new place.
Really rather out of sorts today for no good reason I can put my finger on but I did mange to get a few hours in playing ESO so that was good.
Final Thoughts.
I’ve tried writing this diary blow for blow, like @PixysJourney does, but:
A) my memory ain’t that good
B) I’m not sure there is enough in my day to day life to warrant it.
So I’m going for this slightly simpler style that covers the important stuff.
Obviously the monologues will continue as required.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Think I’ve finally gotten to the bottom of my heat intolerance. This afternoon I walked outside and said “it’s so nice today!” and my dad responded “what? No it’s not, it’s hot out here”. Little did I realize the humidity is only 42% today. Looks like it’s humidity intolerance more than it is heat intolerance lol. 82°F with no humidity feels like a spring day to me. But 82°F with 65% humidity feels like the surface of the sun.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 247 , Monday 01/07/2024
Monday again , up at crack of sparrows fart because herself needed to go to into the office today.
Chores, chores & a few more chores.
Finally got around to cleaning the coffee machine - that is off the todo list for another month or so!
Then I chased the Elephant for a few hours.
I meant to play some ESO but that never happened.
20:00
For a moment there I thought that Mrs S. had had a change of heart & decided to stay downstairs & read to keep me company, rather than vanishing upstairs at the stroke of 8pm as is her wont.
Then I heard the sound of Sophie - who loves to snuggle on her mums lap & catch a few zees of an evening. Mrs S. is not staying downstairs because she wants to be near her OH , she is staying downstairs because she doesn’t want to disturb the cat 🙄🤦♂️
20:08
Sophie has stirred so it seems I’m to be on my own after all 🫤
Final Thoughts.
All my final thoughts are not repeatable in polite society.
Ah well tomorrow is another day.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic I am officially done. I don’t know how people actually enjoy summer, ESPECIALLY with no AC. “85°F is such a nice temp,” just say you enjoy suffering 😭
But no, if I as much as utter a peep about how I’m miserable and overstimulated, suddenly I’m whining, complaining, a primadonna, and “oh so sensitive” about the heat that everyone is SUDDENLY suffering from at the same level as me.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 246 , Sunday 30/06/2024
Had a nice lie in this morning , I do like Sundays.
I took a day off chasin the Elephant today, it was getting dangerously close to overwhelming me, & they do say that a rest is as good as a change.
A dear, dear friend is starting the adventure of a lifetime tomorrow , moving to a new home on her own!
I wish her all the luck in the world & hope that she makes herself a fantastic life in the new place.
Had a very minor adventure of my own today - a trip over to Costco. Absolutely heaving !
I managed to survive the experience , but I regret being a ‘good boy’ & forgoing all treats 🙄🤦♂️
We binge watched Fisherman’s Friends 1 & 2 - a very pleasant experience😊
Final Thoughts.
There is so much going on at the moment , a day of peace & quiet has done me good.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 245 , Saturday 29/06/2024
Just another day in paradise (to quote Phil Collins)
I spent all day ‘chasing the elephant’ -> stop , think where we are , got it ? Right , good, I’m glad we got that sorted !😆
It was too close to being a chore today , I don’t like being pressured into doing stuff, by myself or others.
I did have a good time though, had a lot of laughs with loads of Peeps , who enrich my life beyond all expectation!
I may take tomorrow ‘off’ & just play on the PS5 or read , there is such a thing as ‘too much of a good thing’.
I would hate for my brain to perceive SM as a requirement , rather than a pass time.
Final Thoughts.
To Toot or not to Toot, that is the question,
wether tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous dad jokes, Or to take arms against a sea of memes…
(Apologies to The Bard 😋)
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic One thing I’ve always struggled with is being made fun of for not singing during worship, or not being comfortable with public prayer. Knowing that these things are part of my autism, and not only are acceptable but just as honoring to God has improved my self-image tenfold. I would just like to encourage fellow autistic Christians on here that you shouldn’t let ANYONE tell you that your worship isn’t valid. Last time I checked, the haters aren’t God!
Die ZAKS GmbH (Zentrum für Autismus-Kompetenz Südbaden) muss nach den gescheiterten Verhandlungen mit den Stadt- und Landkreisen aufgeben.
Die Autismus-Therapie-Zentren (Freiburg, Bad-Säckingen, Lahr und Offenburg) und der ambulanten Unterstützungsdienst werden in den nächsten 2-3 Monaten geschlossen. Ob die Beratungsstelle eine Zukunft außerhalb der GmbH hat, ist ungewiss.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 244 , Friday 28/06/2024
A really rough & disturbed night last night, the windows were open to keep the room cool but there was a decent wind & that was making a din. The PF in my right foot decide that it was jealous of all the attention Geoff has been getting & played up all night!
Thankfully today has been a quiet day , no dramas , or need to interact with anyone .
Spent a chunk of the day in the Fediverse chasing the elephant. 😊
Pizza & Thatchers zero for tea & a bit of a Supernatural fest.
Final Thoughts.
Peace - the most elusive of gifts for the ND mind I think .
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
Joked with my work ND group. "So, who's watching the old cis white men going at it tonight?" My co-workers laughed, but then we discussed the failings of the current guy, but how we were all going to vote for him anyways -- because the alternative was just horrible! Especially for #ND folks who are #GBLTQ (which a lot of us are). @actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic#USPolitics#Logic
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Another day of being told I’m “British” and “don’t understand U.S. weather” on social media because I don’t enjoy summer time and temps above about 72°F because of sensory issues. Have to school them right back by telling them I’m from the southern U.S. 😂
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 243 , Thursday 27/06/2024
Up around 6am after a disturbed night.
Achieved a couple of things today managed to descale the coffee machine , I was gonna clean it but that is not one of my favourite jobs so I fixed the kitchen tap which has been sticking for a while instead.
I also managed to rearrange the appointment with Beth, the MH Practitioner.
The sock aid that the Occupational Therapist recommended arrived today, I am officially old !
It doesn’t help that I went for the one with the nice fleecy lining rather than the cheaper plastic ones 🤦♂️
Today the sock aid , next week the zimmer frame!
On the whole today has been a much better day than yesterday.
Final Thoughts.
Life is such a rollercoaster, the best we can do is hold on for dear life !
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Just found out that NT people have REAL habits that happen basically on autopilot. This is news to me.
What most NT people think of as a "habit" I think of as a "task," even if it is a part of my routine. For example, brushing and flossing my teeth is a part of my daily routine, but I have to make myself think about each action separately. I wouldn't call them habits because I literally remind myself to do them every night. It isn't automatic.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 242 , Wednesday 26/06/2024
TL:DR Occupational Therapy, socks & being geographically challenged !
Up around 5:45 , for those of you wondering about Geoff he has slunk off for now, satisfied that there are not enough puritans in my diet to trigger him!
Spent some time tidying up for the incoming visitor - shifted all the junk to my bedroom, which it turns out he needed to see 🙄🤦♂️
So had the Occupational Therapist round this morning a young chap, who was friendly & patient with my rabbiting on.
There is not a lot that he can do to help, mostly because as far as OT goes I don’t need a lot. He is going to discuss my case with the community MH team to see if they can help ( I hope Beth - who I was supposed to see today , see below, isn’t in that meeting ! ) .
He did say that he could try & help get past the agoraphobia & then help me with some of the more crippling social issues.
He also got me to order a sock aid - because I don’t have full mobility in my right leg & putting my sock on is frankly flipping annoying! So we will see how the sock aid helps. The one I ordered looks like an out sized sling shot 😆
I was due to see the Mental Health Practitioner at 15:00 today , sat at my local surgery for an hour before realising that she was sitting waiting for me 3 miles down the road at another surgery ! 🙄🤦♂️
Classic lesson in ‘read what it says in the text’ as opposed to letting autopilot run the show!
So now I have to wait to see if she will call me to book another appointment.
In my defence no-one in my local GPs surgery had the faintest clue if she was in the building or not!
If nothing else one wonders what they would have done in a fire or emergency situation 🙄🤦♂️
So now I’m stressed to buggery about missing the appointment & wasting her valuable time & her being, rightly, pissed off at me!
I’ve had time to calm down now so I’m just berating myself constantly for being a plonker!
Final Thoughts.
One of the possible co-morbidities of being Autistic is anxiety - & boy was mine triggered today.
Another on is ones mind shutting down under stress - & leading one to make really silly mistakes.
Ah well tomorrow is another day!
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
I've never paid much attention to song lyrics. With repeated listening I might learn bits of it but for many songs I've got no clue what they say even after decades of listening. For me, vocals are just another instrument. Still, I've been the vocalist in several bands!
There's a big difference between Finnish and English lyrics for me. As Finnish is my native language, I find it way easier to decipher lyrics, unlike in English, even though my English is pretty good.
Now that I know about my auditory processing difficulties, I wonder if it's related to that. How about my fellow autistics? Do you pay attention to lyrics?
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 241 , Tuesday 25/06/2024
Up around 6am as per , house elf duties have to be done.
Once again I get to around 10am & very last drop of motivation has been driven from me.
Today is bathroom cleaning day.
I put out new towels, which herself put thru the washing machine , I really don’t know what she does with them but they end up in the airing cupboard so stiff you could use them as offensive weapons!
You would think I would be used to this after 25 years, but no, it still triggers me.
Along with all the other triggers of stuff not cleaned , stuff not put away properly & overfeeding the cats .. poof all the plans for today have been eroded away.
Still I guess I should be grateful ,we have a roof over our heads, a car to take us places & food to eat.
Many have so much less.
Just had a call from an Occupational Therapist, they wanna come round in the morning & assess me … eeek!!!
Then I have to go see Beth , the MH Practitioner who first suspected that I was ND & set me on this path.
I left frustrated last time because she failed to understand how triggering Mrs S. is.
Final Thoughts.
I don’t know what it is like for other couples , but I REALLY wish Mrs S. would treat this as OUR house not HER house.
I am really stressed about tomorrow, a stranger in the house judging me, judging the fact that I have not been able to do so many things around the house that should have been done!
Roast Squirrel anyone ?
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Wish more YouTubers and content creators added a toggle to their videos that could switch off background music. Idk about y'all, but so many videos have added music that is unnecessary, distracting, and overstimulating.
I have seen videos on YouTube where the closed captions settings have been programmed with a separate audio track with no commentary, so I know it can be done! Would probably be so helpful for so many people!