Maintain relationships you care about but struggle with.
Focusing on a conversation that is interesting or has valuable information you need but drift off after 30 seconds because you notice something in the background, a misplaced hair on their face, or your brain over corrects and you get stuck in the "must focus" internal mantra.
Remembering to eat instead of hyper focusing on a project and time blindness kicks in and it 14 hours later.
So-man-other-things.
ADHD is a fucking struggle mate. And your advice is oblivious to the realities of the struggles and life.
I wish I could figure out if I have it. I asked my doctor how to get diagnosed, he said I’d need to talk to a psychiatrist. I got a referral and tried to setup and appointment but they said I couldn’t be tested since I have no history of it. They instead want to put me on antidepressants but I’ve gone through enough of them to know that ain’t what my issue is.
Mental health care in this country is a fucking joke.
If you really think you need to be medicated, try different doctors until you find someone who specializes in ADHD. The rest have no clue what they're doing and regularly try to treat the symptoms of ADHD (such as depression about how much your life is coming apart due to ADHD) instead of the cause.
I honestly don’t want to be medicated, but I’d like a diagnosis to help me find strategies. I’m middle aged so have figured out how to live with the brain I have but it would be nice to not have to struggle against my nature so much.
I’m probably just lazy or easily distracted, or disorganized, etc. and am looking for excuses.
If you don't need medication, then a diagnosis doesn't has much more to offer honestly. The same stategies you can discover without a diagnosis as well. Look for ADHD meetups in your area perhaps, or ask around here or in !adhd
Good advice, thanks. I am not ruling out medication, but I would hesitate to put one of my kids on it if they were diagnosed and so I am hesitant for the same reasons. The reason I’d like a diagnosis though is that I am pathologically unable to act without data. I’d feel like a complete imposter at an ADHD event unless I was sure I was one of the ranks.
And it's bad because they're "chores" who "need to be done". In a different structure which recognised the needs of ADHD people those chores would never have been assigned to you in the first place.
I don't think dishes and laundry are a socio-economic problem unless you're implying all ADHD people should always be able to afford household help and assistance. Plenty of people with disabilities and challenges have to deal with chores as a function of being alive, including ADHD people. It's a part of existence that your clothes will need washing, trash will need to be taken out, and I agree that not doing them is a bad thing. The timetable, the consequences of inaction, the associated stress, all of that can be variable and that is where flexibility should be given, but ffs ADHD people should and need to do chores too.
Yes, I think adhd people who can't do housechores should have assistance for it, and in turn they would provide what they can to society. If that is not possible because "they can't afford it" then the system that requires monetary compensation is at fault.
There's plenty of people who like doing chores and don't like doing what adhd people are doing. These two groups can collaborate.
No. You don't get to deny the very real PERSONAL harm done by this condition. No amount of socioeconomic changes could ever stop the personal problems.
And they all stopped playing music at like 19 or 20 so like…they’re fine at their instruments, can read music, even have moments where they sound pretty good. But they ain’t winning a competition lol
